CHARLOTTE — It has come to our attention that we have been accidentally “fine.”. We recently received a very stern, multi-page letter from the lawyers at The Onion informing us that Charlotte residents might be too simple-minded to tell the difference between a local blog and a Chicago-based media empire.
We were horrified to learn that we had recklessly used “the color green” and “serif fonts”—technologies that apparently belong exclusively to the professional satirists. To the entire legal team at The Onion: we are so, so sorry for our excellence.
In an act of total, whimpering submission, we have deleted our Patreon and pivoted to a brand identity that no human, lawyer, or Supreme Court Justice could ever confuse with quality. Please enjoy our new, 100% legally-distinct look.
We hope this $0.00 MS Paint rebrand allows the Global Tetrahedron board of directors to finally find peace.
Please consider donating to our legal fund in these harrowing times: https://buymeacoffee.com/thecharlotten
