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CMS Named One Of The School Systems Of All Time

UPTOWN — On Saturday, Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools (CMS) was officially recognized as one of the school systems of all time, joining an exclusive list that includes other school systems.

“This distinction confirms what we’ve always known—that CMS is a district that has students, teachers, and buildings (also known as mobile units),” said a spokesperson. “Not every organization can say that.”

Officials praised the district’s achievements, highlighting a historic 30% literacy rate, an innovative attendance model where being physically present is considered optional, and a diversity strategy exclusively catered to white families in south Charlotte.

“These are the kinds of bold, forward-looking strategies that set CMS apart,” said one official.

Teachers, too, were recognized for their contributions. With overcrowding, mobile classrooms, and limited resources, educators have become experts at doing more with less. “It’s amazing what you can accomplish with duct tape, thirty-five students, and the same salary you had in 2008,” said one teacher, who described her job as “a fun way to find out how long knees last under constant stress.”

Students echoed the praise. “It’s been great,” said one sophomore, who hasn’t attended since the fifth grade.

“When you look at the facts—that schools opened, students occasionally arrived, and teachers persevered despite using their lunch break to buy their own classroom supplies—there can be no doubt that CMS is one of the school systems of all time,” said the superintendent.