ROCK BOTTOM, SC — The city formerly known as Rock Hill will now be called […]
Author: The Charlotten
CLT Airport Men’s Bathrooms Officially Classified As War Zones
CONCOURSE STALINGRAD— The United Nations voted unanimously on Monday to classify the men’s restrooms at […]
City’s Comic Book Villains Meet On Top Of Bank Of America Tower To Discuss Evil Schemes, Nefarious Plots
TOP SPIRE OF DOOM — The Green Goblin, Lex Luthor, Man Ray, and Bank of […]
Uptown Adds Third Functional Nightclub For People To Stand Around On Their Phones
UPTOWN — A new nightclub is opening this weekend in Uptown for more people to […]
Local Man Honked At For Refusing To Die Making Left Turn
UNIVERISTY CITY — A man who valued his life was honked at Thursday morning for […]
Great Lake Norman Garbage Patch Now Visible From Space
LAKE NORMAN — Lake Norman’s gigantic mound of yeti coolers, rusted farm tools, coal ash, […]
Skyline Gonna Be Chartreuse Tonight Because Fuck You
TOP FLOOR OF BANK OF AMERICA TOWER — City officials confirmed Thursday night’s skyline will […]
Very Secure And Stable Individual Seen Driving Slingshot Around Uptown
UPTOWN — An individual of unquestionably sound mind was seen Monday afternoon driving a bright […]
Concord-Padgett Airport Now Offering Direct Flights to Charlotte Douglas
CONCORD — In a move officials are calling a “major breakthrough in regional transit,” Concord-Padgett […]
“I Live In Charlotte,” Says Dumbass In Huntersville
HUNTERSVILLE, NC — Local dumbass Tyler McMullen, who very clearly resides in Huntersville, once again […]