SPECTRUM CENTER — The Charlotte Hornets front office confirmed Monday that they are “extremely optimistic” […]
Category: State
Cursed CMS Throne Patiently Awaits Next Victim
SECOND WARD — The Iron Throne for the CMS Superintendent is reportedly patiently awaiting its […]
Neese’s Liver Pudding Brick Appointed Interim Mayor of Charlotte
UPTOWN — The Charlotte City Council voted unanimously Wednesday night to appoint a raw, 16-ounce […]
City Council Does Job
UPTOWN — Charlotte City Council reportedly completed the basic responsibilities associated with its position on […]
NCDOT Solicits Community Feedback On Which Private Equity Firm Should Fuck Over Charlotte
UPTOWN — Amid ongoing controversy over proposed changes to the I-77 corridor, Charlotte City Council […]
Duke Energy CEO Asks To Borrow Your Netflix Password
UPTOWN — Duke Energy CEO Harry Sideris reportedly knocked on the front door of a […]
Pathetic Immune System Once Again Defeated By Tree Cum
EVERYWHERE — As pollen levels across the Queen City surged into the visible spectrum this […]
The Charlotten Finalizes Rebrand With Iconic Uptown Installation
UPTOWN — Following a brief period of corporate restructuring and visual identity exploration, local media […]
Bird Pizzeria Announces New Slogan: “Fuck You, Eat Somewhere Else”
OPTIMIST PARK — Nationally renowned pizza joint Bird Pizzeria has announced a bold new slogan […]
“Drake Maye? Oh, We Go Way Back,” Says Local Man Who Is Absolutely Full Of Shit
HUNTERSVILLE — As Huntersville-native Drake Maye prepares to lead the New England Patriots into Super […]